The website's beginnings

Every single day since Paul died, I receive texts, Whatsapp messages and calls asking how I am doing, how the boys are coping. I have been mostly honest about how I'm coping and how proud I am of our boys. Sometimes I catch myself cutting and pasting texts and sending them to friends - not because I am lazy, but, because there is nothing else to say. In some messages, I would say something to lighten up the mood and in some I would lie (because I don't want to show how vulnerable I am).

Since Paul's funeral service, I was amazed and humbled by the number of people who told me that they only knew one facet of Paul's rich life.

I want everyone to know what an incredibly active, loving, caring husband and dad he was; what a passionate environmentalist he was; what a clever and natural birder he was. His moral compass was like no other.

Where better to start but with a website where I can publish all the eulogies from his funeral service.

I also found myself chatting to Paul constantly - as though he was in another room - reminiscing about a holiday, telling him off because something one of the boys did reminded me of him (probably how not to load the dishwasher) or moaning about the house being a bottomless money pit.

So, I thought I'd use the website to record my thoughts, my conversations, my memories and most importantly, my daily struggles getting through life without Paul.